Chapter 1: The Unexpected Lessons of Comedy Fails

Experiencing a failed stand-up routine can be surprisingly enlightening.

Photo by Bogomil Mihaylov on Unsplash

It wasn’t simply silence; that would have been an improvement. Instead, there was a lone, inebriated elderly woman laughing uproariously at every punchline, making the surrounding quietness even more jarring.

How could this occur?

My debut stand-up performance had been a resounding success, with the audience enjoying my jokes about topics like chlamydia and bulimia. Back then, the crowd consisted of carefree, drunken students, unlike the present audience, which was predominantly composed of middle-aged couples enjoying a romantic dinner—along with my two housemates and that peculiar old lady in the front row.

I relied on the same routine as before, supplemented with new material. However, if they were unamused by the more risqué jokes, my fresh content might just cause them to choke on their salmon.

Ultimately, I completed my set without being booed off stage. There were a few obligatory claps, typical of British politeness, but it was clear: I had bombed.

This is the nightmare every comedian dreads, yet I emerged from it with some valuable insights.

Key Takeaways from Comedy Bombing

1. You Can't Please Everyone

   My initial audience adored my controversial humor, while this new group seemed affronted. When you express a bold personality, reactions will vary widely; some will resonate with you, while others will be put off. Ultimately, it’s preferable to be a polarizing figure than to be seen as mediocre. Adapting to your audience is a skill that will develop over time.

2. Surviving Failure Builds Resilience

   I didn’t perish—at least not literally. I still had my limbs and my ability to speak. Many people avoid pursuing their dreams due to fear of failure. However, once you face your worst fears and come out unscathed, you find that nothing can hold you back.

3. Failure is a Stepping Stone to Improvement

   If my second performance had been merely satisfactory, I might have returned to the same material without change. However, this challenging experience motivated me to enhance my craft. While it’s easy to blame the audience for being unresponsive, true growth comes from recognizing when adjustments are necessary.

4. Revisiting Your Setbacks is Essential

   My housemate recorded the gig, and I was reluctant to watch it. Ignoring it seemed easier than confronting my mistakes. However, avoiding the discomfort does not lead to improvement. I forced myself to review the footage multiple times, cringing with every laugh from that tipsy grandmother. Analyzing my performance revealed awkward moments, poor timing, and disengaging body language. To truly improve, one must study past performances.

5. Persistence is Key to Success

   Regardless of the field, every expert was once a novice. Every champion has faced defeat but has chosen to rise again. There’s a reason why only a few become true experts; it's tough to learn from mistakes and keep going. However, you only truly fail if you stop trying.

I never aspired to be a professional comedian, but I enjoyed the thrill of performing. I’m pleased to say I returned to the stage with refined jokes and a much more receptive audience. Here’s a clip from one of my more successful performances.

Universal Lessons from Setbacks

These five lessons are applicable beyond comedy. Whether you're striving to improve your tennis game, write compelling articles, or master social interactions, keep these principles in mind when facing failure:

• Acknowledge that you can’t win every time.
• Understand that failure doesn’t define you; you’re still standing.
• Take pride in your efforts.
• View failures as opportunities for growth.
• Reflect on your setbacks and identify areas for improvement.
• Never surrender!

By committing to these five steps repeatedly, you can achieve success in any endeavor.