Chapter 1: Understanding Post-Breakup Emotions

The aftermath of this breakup has left me feeling exposed and vulnerable, confronting a multitude of past traumas that have built up over the last decade.

Throughout this journey, I have grappled with resentment towards my mother, especially with the perception that her marriage to a white man was a means to gain societal power. I’ve often thought she desired a mixed-race child for social advancement, leading me to question whether she truly loves me or merely sees me as a tool for her comfort in society. However, I strive to remind myself that for every shadow, there is also light.

I try to envision that she did her best with the resources available to her, acknowledging that life is rarely perfect or straightforward, and that we all face challenging choices. I remind myself that she loves me in her own way, and if I dwell on things beyond my control, it will only drive me to madness.

While the past is unchangeable, I realize I have the power to influence my present and future, and I must not lose sight of this truth. I refuse to fall into the trap of division among people and instead focus on my own actions, the conduct of others, and honoring my own feelings and boundaries. When I make choices rooted in love, I can’t go wrong.

Section 1.1: Embracing My Own Emotions

I am learning to acknowledge the importance of fully experiencing my emotions rather than suppressing or ignoring them. I am beginning to trust myself and make decisions independently, rather than relying on others to fulfill my needs in exchange for what I offer them. Sometimes, embracing independence is vital.

Subsection 1.1.1: Breaking Free from Dysfunctional Patterns

I am bidding farewell to the patterns I adopted from dysfunctional relationships—“Stay small. Support others, not yourself, to survive. Trust your brain, not your emotions.” I understand that my experiences are not isolated, and life can be unfair. Each of us does our best with the hand we are dealt, and I can forgive myself for not knowing better, for believing in others while neglecting my own needs, and for sometimes doubting my worthiness of true care.

Chapter 2: Creating a Vision for the Future

In the video "How To Move Forward After a Breakup - 3 Powerful Tips," viewers are offered actionable insights into navigating their emotions and finding strength in moving forward.

I yearn for a nurturing, joyful family characterized by open communication, healthy boundaries, and a shared sense of purpose. I aspire to cultivate a family dynamic that thrives on love, not fear, built on the intent to contribute positively to society. While I feel an urgent desire to transition from this phase of waiting to a life I have envisioned, I recognize that nothing worthwhile comes easily. Perhaps this is a time for me to rise to the occasion, to work diligently even when motivation wanes, and to remember that the challenges I face are smaller than the faith I hold.

In "NEUROSCIENTIST: Worst Thing To Do After Breakup | Andrew Huberman," the discussion delves into the pitfalls to avoid when healing from a breakup, guiding viewers towards healthier coping mechanisms.

Here’s to taking life one day at a time.