# Achieve Emotional Freedom in Just 90 Seconds: A Stoic Approach
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Understanding Anxiety and Stoicism
Experiencing anxiety can feel like an endless race, akin to a slow turtle. It often seems to drag on longer than it should, but in reality, it might not be as prolonged as we think. We tend to dwell on the same thoughts repeatedly, which can amplify our feelings and diminish our enjoyment of the day. While it's crucial to acknowledge our emotions rather than suppress them, true freedom comes from not being ensnared by them. Is there a method to process anxiety more swiftly, so we don't lose entire days to it?
The Essence of Stoicism
When we think of Stoicism, we might picture someone devoid of emotion, but that's a misconception. This philosophy teaches that anyone can lead a fulfilling life in the present moment. Stoics experience emotions but deliberately focus on what lies within their control.
Stoicism encompasses three core disciplines: the Discipline of Desire, the Discipline of Action, and the Discipline of Assent. The Discipline of Assent focuses on our thoughts, teaching us to differentiate between initial reactions and final judgments. Matthew Van Natta in The Beginner’s Guide to Stoicism outlines three steps for this process:
- Initial Impression: Something occurs (e.g., another driver cuts you off).
- Objective Representation: Acknowledge what happened (e.g., “I was cut off”).
- Value Judgment: Form an opinion about the event. If we don’t pause, we might react negatively, thinking, “What a jerk!” However, if we take a moment to reflect, we might realize, “It’s beyond my control; they may not have seen me,” allowing us to move on.
While this sounds straightforward, can we truly implement it when life throws challenges our way?
The Neuroscience Behind Emotions
Neuroscientist Dr. Jill Taylor explains that our bodies require about 90 seconds to process emotions, during which stress hormones surge and recede. The sequence typically unfolds like this:
- We encounter a situation.
- Adrenaline floods our system.
- After 90 seconds, it's cleared out.
Dr. Taylor terms this the "90-second rule," stating that once an emotional reaction occurs, there's a brief chemical process lasting 90 seconds. Any lingering emotional response is a result of our choice to remain trapped in that emotional cycle.
So, why do emotions seem to linger longer? Often, we re-trigger our emotional loops with repetitive thoughts. Our bodies continue to release stress hormones, but if we can interrupt this cycle before it spirals, we can allow our emotions to pass naturally.
The Importance of Observation
Instead of getting caught in a repetitive thought cycle, we can simply observe our emotions as they come and go. By identifying what we're feeling, we can facilitate their passage.
The Experiments: Testing the Theories
I decided to apply these insights in two separate experiments. The first occurred before I fully grasped Stoicism, while the second was after I had gained some understanding.
Experiment One:
During a conversation with my husband, I started to feel anxious. I wanted to test the 90-second rule:
- Identify the emotion—use an emotional wheel if necessary.
- Observe where you feel it—tightness in your chest? Butterflies in your stomach?
- Continue your activity while feeling the emotion, steering clear of re-engaging negative thought patterns.
After the conversation, I resumed writing while acknowledging the tightness in my chest. As anxious thoughts arose, I redirected my focus to my writing. Eventually, I felt the tightness dissipate, akin to someone drawing it out from me. While it didn't take a strict 90 seconds, it was certainly faster than my previous coping methods.
Experiment Two:
I felt anxiety about upcoming plans while lying in bed, thinking, “What if I can’t sleep tonight?” One of Stoicism’s key tenets is discerning what is within our control. That night, I combined my Stoic learnings with the 90-second rule:
- What am I anxious about? Upcoming plans.
- Is it within my control? Yes/No—while I committed to the plans, I can't dictate the outcome.
- Does it align with my values? Yes, I value keeping commitments.
- Imagine the worst outcome—feeling exhausted after a busy weekend.
- Imagine it going well—recalling past experiences when anxious plans turned out positively.
This reflective process mirrored the pause before making value judgments in Stoicism. Although I still had lingering thoughts, I consistently returned to these questions, reminding myself that it's acceptable to feel whatever arises. Ultimately, it took about 5 to 10 minutes, but I fell asleep shortly after, reassured that the plans would be enjoyable.
Final Thoughts: The Effectiveness of the 90-Second Rule
While my experiences exceeded the 90-second mark, it's evident that practice is essential, and I cannot expect immediate mastery. Beyond these two trials, I've noticed a marked improvement in my ability to pause before reacting, especially in situations where I typically respond quickly. The synergy of the 90-second rule, along with the practice of pausing and relinquishing control, has equipped me with the confidence to break free from emotional loops. With continued effort, achieving emotional freedom in 90 seconds is indeed possible.
The first video, "90 Seconds to a Life You Love with Joan Rosenberg," explores how to navigate emotions effectively and improve overall well-being.
The second video, "Dr. Joan Rosenberg: '90 Seconds to a Life You Love'," delves deeper into the relationship between emotions and Stoicism, offering practical tips for emotional management.